Forget about Dr. Phil. Ask Dr. Jesse!
What have you always wanted to know about human behaviour, but have been too afraid to ask (or too lazy to look up)? In this blog post, I thought I'd try something different: you tell me what I should write about. Go on, it's anonymous!
Think of it as an advice column sans the fact that I'm not a middle-aged, know-it-all shrew telling you to get your act together. In keeping with my "quirky little things" theme, and given that I'm an academic psychologist with a penchant for sleuthing out obscure facts from an oftentimes confusing, jargon-filled literature, ask me something based on your own experiences in being human and I'll tell you what the research out there has to say about it. Who cares about opinions? I'll give you the empirical facts.
I'm trying to sharpen my generalist skills, so it can be anything ... anything. I'd say keep it clean, but that wouldn't be any fun now would it? But for editorial reasons, do try to keep it, well, at least delicately worded.
Here's how it'll work: I'll leave this post up for one week (that's until Thursday, May 15), cross my fingers that I get some interesting responses, and then choose my favourite question. My next post will be devoted entirely to answering this question. Ask as many questions as you'd like, just be sure to post them separately. And here's my built-in escape clause: If I don't get any questions, or they're all duds, I'll simply nix this little experiment.
Use your real name, or a pseudonym, or no name at all. So, what are you waiting for?
whats the deal with jungs
whats the deal with jungs personality types, keirsey temprament sorter and other tests of that sort? is there any reality in them?
crankiness and irritability
crankiness and irritability associated with pms; is it for real or an excuse?
according to Freud dreams
according to Freud dreams are just wish fulfilments. what about some dreams that could have a bit of premonition? or are they just not being analyzed properly?
is it true that if you were
is it true that if you were sexually molested as a child, your personality will be scarred for life?
Do shallow/fake people know
Do shallow/fake people know that they're fake? And what makes them that way?
Good one. Jesse, I doubt
Good one.
Jesse, I doubt you'll have much trouble getting a bunch of good questions here, so I think you should make this a regular feature of the blog - as I suspect you might have thought to begin with.
I'll come up with my own questions later, but for now I think this should be the first one.
Prejudice
Is prejudice simply a sympton of evolutionary psychology, in which case why don't we celebrate it as critical to our survival?
And if you can answer that one, then i can ask 'Why do we think of Obama as black when his gene pool is just as equally white?'
Are humans born LGBT or do
Are humans born LGBT or do they make a conscious/subconsious decision?
No More Sex
Just wondering what to do when your husband of many years tells you that he never wants to have sex again, and that he is never going to change his mind. There is no kissing, hugging nothing really. Such a lovely man, and this is hurting me a lot. He even told me to get another bloke.
Fat Women and Babies
I don't know if there are any studies on this but I have always suspected a link between weight and the desire to have children. Every overweight friend I have, once married, becomes obsessed with immediately becoming a mother. My thin friends are more apt to take thier time starting a family. I have some ideas about this but I'm pretty sure they are just my own bias. One, I think chunky girls are more jealous and fearful of keeping thier husbands so they want to seal the deal with offspring. Two, they aren't as used to being looked at sexually and don't fear losing thier shape during pregnancy, and three, they see motherhood and pregnancy as the perfect excuse to stop worrying about thier weight as much ( this could be healthy). I feel like a total b asking this question, but I'm honestly curious. I have seen this discrepancy in the desire for kids over and over in my circle of friends.
Cutter
What does it mean when y ou have the urge to cut yourself every day but you never act on it?
I'm an otherwise mentally stable human being, but I frequently, out-of-the-blue, fantasize about slitting the back of my legs or slashing the outer side of my wrist.
Is this normal? Do other people think about this too?
Kids Stealing
My three year old has an odd habit of taking things. He will secret them into his pocket and bring them home, from daycare, stores, other people's houses. I worry that he is a klepto. Could this be true.
Generally when he takes things he waits until we get home to show me. I've started checking his pockets before we leave anyplace because this is an embarassing situations.
He takes toys, rubber bands, clothes, papers, pens, and anything he can place into his pocket.
Should I have him psychologically evaluated? (historically, he is not exposed to this type of behavior, he has never been abused, and we are pretty well-off financially so he generally gets whatever he needs and wants. Also, "punishment" for this behavior typically consists of me having him to return the item and apologize for taking it, along with he and I having a discussion on 'What is stealing?' and why it is wrong.)
Phobia
How do I break my phobia of spiders?
Every night before I go to sleep, I have to check my bed. Before I get dressed I check my clothes and shoes. If I walk up the hall, I'm looking at the ceiling, corners, floor.
It's starting to interfere with my day to day life. I can't go anywhere without wondering if there are spiders in my car.
I've never been bitten by a spider, but I live out in the country where spiders are commonplace. Not to mention, I live so far out that if I were to be bitten I don't think I'd be able to reach a medical center in time to get an anti-venom.
I know ultimately this fear is unreasonable, as I don't think any uber dangerous specie of spider lives near me. Yet, I can't shake the willies at just the thought of a dark corner, a hidden cranny, or any random place that could possibly harbor these eight-legged nightmares.
PsychoSemantics
Could schizophrenia, dissociative identity disorder, ASD, and other psych issues that involve integration of speech and hearing, personality and language, be a byproduct of how we internalize communication?
How concretely do semantics and communication play a role in how we conceptualize self and other?
I.e. Schizophrenic "voices" have been explained as the self losing recognition of its inner voice.
DID is frequently characterized by completely different speech patterns, accents, and vocabulary.
ASD involves a different communicative effort, thinking in pictures, I'm told, rather than words.
What's the link? Is there a link? How much does language play a role in the "idea of" self?
PS: I was replying to the
PS: I was replying to the shallow-fake question :)
No femanle role model?
What impact does not having a positive, female role model or influence have on a women's life? Having had a mother who is a good person but has continually made one bad decision after the other for an entire lifetime has left me knowing who I don't want to be but very lost in what a healthy women really looks like and ,to be perfectly honest, wondering if such a women exists. Am I destined to be a female chauvinist? And if so, is it me who I don't respect?
I know there is more than one question here, but they are related.
I can't remember the last
I can't remember the last time I experienced any emotion strongly, whether it be happiness (even on my wedding day), fear or anger. Also I am an extreme perfectionist. Am I depressed or just dead inside? I have felt this way ever since a heartbreak over 9 years ago despite now having a loving husband and a supportive family.
Relationships
Is it true that familial problems lead to relationship problems? I am an 18 year old female and my parents split up (because of cheating...) when i was 13. I haven't ever had a boyfriend, preferring instead to focus on school and sports. I like the idea of having a boyfriend, but I don't trust people (girls or guys). Do you think that problems at home could have spawned my inability to trust other people?
Thanks.
Prenatal Environment and Homosexuality
Could you explain the hypothesized link between prenatal development and homosexuality? So fascinating!
Do evil persons know that
Do evil persons know that they are evil or that their acts are evil ? Do they have any self awareness ?
Hello Dr. Jesse, how are
Hello Dr. Jesse, how are you?
It's very interesting your blog. I'd like to know if there is some explanation about homossexual behavior from evolutionary physchology point of view.
Thanks!
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