Psychology Today Blogs - Sexual Stereotypes

Fantasy Weddings Can Hurt More Than Your Wallet

Daisy Grewal, Ph.D. — Thu, 08 May 2008 22:35:21 -0700

Brides-to-be are told they are allowed to be a princess for day. Besides making a dent in the bridal pocketbook, does wanting to be a princess undermine women’s power?

Marriage in this country might be about a man and a woman, but planning a wedding is really about the bride. This is more than just tradition—it’s a capitalist driven idea that has managed to create a huge economic windfall for wedding vendors. It’s a fact that as the divorce rate has continued the increase, the annual cost of an American wedding has also increased. The estimated average cost ranges from $19,000 - $30,000.

Now the price wouldn’t bother me so much if it wasn’t laced with so much fairytale propaganda. Advertisers are no dummies, and they know how to make even the most secure woman feel cheap for not wanting to spend more than $1,000 on a dress she’ll wear only once in her lifetime.

A casual flip through a bridal magazine found me face to face with an ad in which a young bride-to-be was sitting on a throne in a shaded forest. In front of her, down one knee, was her groom, or rather “prince charming” by the way he was dressed. The ad was brilliant because it captured just what advertisers would love for women to believe – that a wedding is a temporary suspension of disbelief in fairytales and that a bride is in fact a princess. After all, princesses are unlikely to be found shopping in the bargain bin.

And what’s wrong with that you might ask? Besides unloading your hard-earned cash, is there any real problem with the idea that a bride ought to be treated like a princess? Is there really any harm for wanting to be Cinderella for a day?

I recently came across a study that attempted to provide a partial answer to these questions. Dr. Laurie Rudman at Rutgers University was interested in finding out the effects of romantic fantasies on women’s psyches. She measured women’s implicit, i.e. subconscious, endorsement of romantic fantasies. She also measured their conscious endorsement of the same romantic fantasies, i.e. how much they actually said they believed in them. Rudman’s first finding was that there was a large divergence between what women reported desiring and their subconscious feelings.

Her second finding was that only women’s subconscious endorsement of romantic fantasies predicted their interest in achieving personal power. Women who subconsciously endorsed romantic fantasies reported a lower desire for personal power.

It’s only one study, I know, but I offer it as some food for thought as to the effect of romantic fantasies on women. A desire for personal power need not be exploitive – it could also denote a desire to achieve, to lead, or to make an impact on others.

Regardless of their possible negative effects, romantic fantasies aren’t going away. Not only do they make for good movie plotlines, they are something that society – especially advertisers – would hate to lose.

Source: Rudman, L. A. & Heppen, J. (2003). Implicit romantic fantasies and women's interest in personal power: A glass slipper effect? Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 29, 1357-1370.

Does Listening to Eminem Make People Sexist?

Daisy Grewal, Ph.D. — Thu, 01 May 2008 14:00:22 -0700

For decades now people have been debating whether listening to rap music causes people to have more negative (and sometimes violent) attitudes towards women.

A study published this year examined whether exposure to misogynistic rap music, in the form of Eminem, increases sexism towards women. Participants were assigned to one of three experimental conditions: 1) no music; 2) misogynistic rap music; 3) non-misogynistic rap music. Afterwards, all of the participants filled out a survey designed to measure sexist attitudes.

The researchers found that listening to Eminem did in fact increase participants' negative attitudes towards women. In addition, the study found a relationship between listening to the rap music, whether or not it was misogynistic, and more negative attitudes towards women - particularly among male participants. Out of fairness, the statistical effects were weak but nonetheless significant.

Although hardly definitive, the study suggests that rap music may play a role in fostering negative attitudes towards women. Even more disturbingly, it suggests that rap music doesn't need to be outwardly hostile towards women in order to increase sexist attitudes. The finding is open to interpretation, but it is possible there might be an association in people's heads between rap music and misogyny.

In the meantime, findings like this only fuel the ongoing debate about music censorship. I can see both sides on this one. Given that the largest audience for rap artists like Eminem are teenage boys, the findings seem to support censorship. However, I'm not a big fan of censoring as a substitute parenting. Plus, censorship and controversy can often backfire as both make for very good publicity.

______________
Source: Cobb, M. & Boettcher, W. (2008). Ambivalent sexism and misogynistic rap music: Does exposure to Eminem increase sexism? Journal of Applied Social Psychology, 37, 3025-3042.

Why Hillary Can't Win

Daisy Grewal, Ph.D. — Mon, 28 Apr 2008 12:22:25 -0700

Regardless of Hillary's political fate, she'll never be able to win the challenge of being perceived as both a good candidate and a likable person.

Two years ago when Clinton was gearing up for the presidential race, Time magazine hit the nail on the head with a cover that featured Hillary's face and the words: "Love her, Hate her (check one)."

My cousin and I wrote an op-ed on the topic last February. Many of our critics thought we were endorsing Hillary and accusing her opponents of being prejudiced against women. I admit the editorial could have been written in a less biased way, and I hope I won't make the same mistake in this blog entry.

My goal was to point out that the widespread polarized reactions to Hillary can be explained by several lines of psychological research. Susan Fiske at Princeton has demonstrated that people's stereotypes about women tend to fall along two disparate dimensions: warmth and competence. Consequently, women must walk a precarious tightrope -- the more competent they seem, the less people like them.

Alice Eagly of Northwestern University has devoted decades to understanding people's reactions to women's leaders. She's found that people tend to evaluate female leaders unfavorably because the traits that people typically associate with women (e.g. warm, caring, nurturance) are antithetical to the traits people typically associate with good leaders (e.g. strong and assertive). Eagly has also found that women who lead in masculine ways tend to be disliked.

Granted the research mentioned above was done primarily with college students, a sample hardly representative of the general population. However, to this I must argue: college students tend to be more liberal in their political and gender attitudes than the rest of the country. If college students can't allow a woman to be both nice and competent, where does that leave the voter sample at large? Its also worth noting that in most studies, women are just as likely as men to dislike a woman leader.

Regardless of whether Hillary wins, it is my hope she will help us better understand the role gender plays in politics. Hopefully, in time we will realize that gender discrimination doesn't have to be motivated by hatred or insecurity; instead, our deeply cherished beliefs about the roles played by men and women in society can sometimes lead to unfortunate prejudices.

_______________________

Gender Outlaws: Switching from a man to a woman (or vice versa)

Daisy Grewal, Ph.D. — Wed, 23 Apr 2008 10:27:01 -0700

Transsexuals and transgendered people can often tell us a great deal about our society because they've experienced what most of us never will: being perceived as a man or a woman in the same lifetime.

A worthy read on this topic is Kate Bornstein's Gender Outlaw, which chronicles some of her experiences as a transsexual woman. One memorable passage describes the first time Kate walked into a store after being able to successfully pass as a woman. She was shocked to find that nobody was treating her with any respect. A so-called "normal" woman who's been a woman her entire life would never know the difference.

Ben A. Barres, a neurobiologist who happens to be a transsexual man, wrote a commentary for Nature about sex differences in scientific ability. Barres started out his career as a female scientist and then transitioned to being male. Consequently, he personally experienced how differently people treat male and female scientists. Largely spurred by the Larry Summers controversy, Barres' article makes a convincing case against purely biological explanations for gender differences. If you're interested, the full article can be viewed here.

In Gender Outlaw Kate Bornstein writes, "I know I'm not a man...and I've come to the conclusion that I'm probably not a woman, either...The trouble is, we're living in a world that insists we be one or the other."

But are we really? Most people reading this blog probably think so, but there are cultures on our planet that recognize more than just two genders...more on what that looks like later.

Gender Makes the World Go Round

Daisy Grewal, Ph.D. — Mon, 21 Apr 2008 12:03:50 -0700

Have you ever had the experience of walking down the street with friends and spotting somebody who doesn't quite look like a man or a woman?

"Is that a man...or a woman...?" you wonder out loud just as your friends are about to say the exact same thing. You find yourself staring at the person, transfixed, and strangely bothered that you can't figure it out.

Most of us can deal with not knowing immediately what somebody's occupation, race, religion, or favorite sports team is (although we might ask these burning questions during an initial conversation). But not knowing somebody's gender leaves us thoroughly baffled. In fact, not knowing somebody's gender is likely to bring social interaction to a standstill.

Anyone who's ever watched the popular SNL skit "It's Pat!" knows this as the truth. In the skit, the gender ambiguous "Pat" stymies, irritates, and exasperates everyone he/she interacts with. Jokes and hilarity ensue as the characters on the skit try their hardest to reveal Pat's gender by asking Pat probing questions. The skit is amusing for a lot of reasons, but I think it's a great example of illustrating how important gender is in relating to others.

It's not just gender ambiguous adults that can leave us tongue-tied: people also feel uneasy around a newborn until they know whether it's a boy or a girl. It's often the first question that we ask to a pregnant woman, "Is it a boy or a girl?"

Unbeknownst to this unborn fetus is that this simple distinction of being a boy or a girl will profoundly alter its experience here on earth in almost every way possible.

In this blog, I will attempt to explore the important role that gender plays in our lives. I believe that gender is the most fundamental category that we use to understand ourselves and our world. It defines who we are and how we expect ourselves and others to be. The reason that most of us don't realize this is because of the simple fact that we spend our entire lives as one gender or the other. My next post will explore the experiences of people who have switched genders and were brave enough to tell the world about it.